Onety

Onety: numberal. Onety is an alternative way of saying "ten," only it is far more intuitive for foreigners than learning a completely new word for the same digit with a zero added to it. We can find the first occurrence of the word onety in one of Lewis Carroll´s unpublished manuscripts about the logic-lacking English language:
"Reading an unspecified book, it came to me while reading it that as I read it, my eyes could not be contained because my thoughts were being carried away towards the nature of numbers. I am of the opinion that onety should be a valid alternative for saying "ten," as it would follow the trend of the following tens after it. In fact, now that I come to think of it, I am of the opinion that as well as onety, we should have the word twoty, threety, fourty, fivety and eightty (as sixty, seventy and ninety are already the prevailing ways of saying these digits)."
Well... one can see why Carroll never got around to publishing this manuscript. Nonetheless, this does not decrease the validity of his argument based on profound logic and reason.

Numberal

Numberal: numberal. A numberal, as opposed to a numeral, is a part of speech encompassing all numbers. This is slightly different from the common (but faulty) practice that assigns numbers to parts of speech according to what function they fulfil in a sentence. For example, while the number 100 will be an adjective in a sentence like "I ate a hundred pies for breakfast," it will be a noun in a sentence like "Johnny, tell me what a hundred minus two hundred is." Numberals were invented to make English slightly more logical and are classified by the Halifax Dictionary as the ninth part of speech. 

Forty

Forty: adjective. Pertaining to forts or bearing some resemblance to anything that has something to do with them. A man who looks like a soldier who currently resides in a fort may, therefore, be called forty because of this rather vague definition. However, the word is more commonly used in association with houses that look just a little too bulky and well protected to pass off for normal houses. This has been the case in a court ruling in Britain that ordered a man to pay extra fort taxes for his house featuring a moat with crocodiles and a device that at opening the front door fired a cannon ball at the visitor.  

Taurate

Taurate: noun. The sum of 2 pirates. Taurates are shown in media to operate 2 ships, have 2 peg-legs and 2 eye patches, 2 normal legs and 2 working eyes, and have 2 parrots on their shoulders. Taurates were feared twice as much as pirates, but were often followed by people who hoped to find their treasure, they had twice as much hidden but half as well as they mark the area with 2 “X”s. They were feared 4 times as much as pirates because, not only because they were twice as dangerous, they also looked quite scary with twice the eyes, legs, shoulders, and teeth as a pirate. This leads some to conclude that the fear of a sum of n things is relative to n^z While others claim that it is equal to 3n-2, there is not yet evidence to prove one of these equations over the other but many say that this question will have an answer by the end of 2016 and then walk away enigmatically without explanation.

Copywrong

Copywrong: Noun. A legal ban for a specific artist or publisher to produce certain works. This is often planned by companies to get rid of competition by banning the competition from using specific products whether or not the product has actually been developed or any rights are owned by the first company, this would get rid of competition but not affect smaller companies creating the illusion that the first company is being nice to them. While this is often planned by companies it is rarely executed mostly because governments are reluctant to grant copywrongs to companies especially ones submitted by a source that does not have any rights to the product banned by the copywrong. While it is unusual, in November of 1995, a company producing gravelals shut down because a copywrong left it unable to make money. The company was doing very poorly at selling its footgear, so it started selling a recipe of lemon pie that its employees developed. Soon after production, the company received a copywrong concerning the pie they were selling and were left with no source of income. While it is unclear who submitted the copywrong, a reliable source claims that it was sent by a company that does not own rights to any food products or shoes and would not have any obvious interest in getting rid of the gravelal producers but they did have good arguments for why the copywrong should be passed.

Plancking

Plancking: noun. An old fad amongst young physicists where one would suspend themselves 1.61619926 × 10^-35 meters above the surface of various objects around a laboratory (typically objects that are unlikely to cause any damage).  Soon after this started, there were incidents of people injuring themselves doing it. It became seen as stupid and several scientists spent hours desperately writing equations to show that they did not over-come the atomic forces necessary to get close enough to the object, disproving that they ever plancked.

Feastivity

Feastivity: noun. A celebration which is entirely composed of a large meal, generally of at least 8 different courses, ranging from entrees, second entrees, soups, main dishes, deserts, appetisers, side dishes and hors d'oeuvre. A feastivity can occur for virtually any occasion as long as the meals are appropriately themed, and do not in some way insult that which is being celebrated. Feastivities are very popular in Denmark and Togo, where there are special companies dedicated solely to organising them.

Roboot

Roboot: noun. A large and heavy robotic shoe. These are commonly made as parts for humanoid robots, and are in fact and essential part, because they hold the Ethernet router as well as the radio receiver. This makes them one of the most vital parts of a robot, right after the 6th left rib and the ring finger of the right hand. The largest roboot factory is actually located in a secret location, to avoid the danger of someone destroying the factory and thereby crippling the worldwide robot market.

Juristiction

Juristiction: noun. The official power to make decisions over all things branch, twig, sapling, cane, pole and stake, as well as all things glue, adhesive, fixative and paste. There are few bodies in the world who have juristiction. In fact there is the International Court of Fixative and Twig in Addis Ababa and the International Court of Adhesive and Branch in Nanjing, who have all the power of juristiction throughout the world, which is why all of the relating matters have to be brought before them.

Chewing

Chewing: noun. That which is found in the mouth, after it has been masticated but before it has entered the oesophagus. Chewings are usually very unpleasant in consistency, look, smell and taste, which is why they are so quickly swallowed by the chewee (not to be mistaken with the nickname for the Star Wars character Chewbacca). Chewings should always remain in the mouth and should never be taken out, as that is disgusting and inappropriate.

Gravelal

Gravelal: noun. A type of open-toed shoe designed to be worn on small rock fragments. The soles of these shoes are typically thicker than the soles of sandals and the straps are more rigid. While it would seem simple to tell the difference between sandals and gravelals, a well-worn gravelal can be very difficult to tell from a sandal. Mistaking old gravelals for sandals is a fear shared by many countries, which has resulted in extensive regulation to make sure that shoe manufacturing companies clearly distinguish between the two products so it is clear even as a gravelal ages that it is not a sandal. Many of these companies believe that following such regulation is too much work and instead do not produce gravelals at all, resulting in much of the population not being able to get gravelals which will likely be the cause of up to 14 accidents in the next 10 years. There are UN security and human rights meetings scheduled to address this issue in 2015 that will hopefully result in a productive change of SIR (Shoe-Identification Regulation).

Shaadow

Shaadow: noun. A shadow which is longer than twice the length of that, which it is the shadow of. Shaadows are common occurrences after 6 o'clock, if the sun is still up at that point. Something very rare is a moon shaadow, photographs of those are valued very highly and sold that prices close to $43,000. One must be very careful to not claim that something is a shaadow when in fact it isn't. There are severe punishments, which are implemented when something like that occurs.

Panga

Panga: noun. The word panga has many different meanings, some of which are listed below:

• A panda which has been born somewhere in the vicinity of the Ganges river. Specifically the panda has to have been born within 32.6443 fathoms of the Ganges river.
• Manga all the characters of which are either pandas or pans. However manga which feature only both pandas and pans cannot be called panga as that is a whole separate category of graphic novel.
• A special type of pan which is rectangular and is made specially so that only geese and cashews can be made in it. 

Baurble

Baurble: noun. A Christmas tree decoration made entirely of barbed wire. These decorations are very popular in Kentucky, especially in the Radcliff area. They are made carefully by even more carefully selected 54 year old middle-aged women, with a birth mark on their left thyroglossal cyst, who require special gloves made of anthracene. These gloves are very rare, which means that every year, only 256 and a 1/2 baurbles are made, and these are then shared among the people and horses of Kentucky.

Abasinate

Abasinate: verb. To blind by putting a hot tin basin near someone's eyes. Clearly this something that is done quite commonly, which is why it required a word of its own to describe this action. The word was coined by the famous Cynewulf, who required the word for one of his poems, as it has fewer syllables than: "putting a hot tin basin near someone's eyes". Cynewulf's work is extremely influential, far past the effects and impact of this word, which has now entered common daily use. That is why Cynewulf and his work is recognised yearly on what is known as "Marmot Day".

Exasperaness

Exasperaness: noun. The description of the amount or description of exasperation or how exasperated and tired someone is. This word was created by Thomas Alva Edison, who in a moment of surprising clarity and brilliance and having stayed up for 53 hours straight, decided to use direct current, and later claimed that he had come up with the idea in a moment of extreme exasperaness. That is until Nikola Tesla came up with alternate current and Edison began to claim that he had had the idea in a moment of extreme exasperaness, but not of clarity, but confusion.

Abuntu

Abuntu: noun. A word for what can best be described as "human evilness". This is inherent in all people, but more obvious in some. Abuntu is well-known to the indigenous people of Transnistria, whose life goal is to eradicate the abuntu within them. There are many well known examples of people who embraced the abuntu within them, such as Victor von Doom, Dick Cheney, Lex Luthor and Granny Goodness.

Sempathy

Sempathy: noun. The capacity to recognise the emotions and feelings of other people and then understanding these emotions and feelings, potentially feeling the emotions and feelings along with the people. It is universally recognised that people who suffer from sempathy are at a great disadvantage to everyone else, as they get absolutely nothing done or achieve anything, because they spend their days feeling sorry for other people. Those foolish enough to see sempathy as an advantage have been publicly ridiculed and in some cases flogged.

Disputate

Disputate: verb. To cut off or separate an argument from a larger idea or text. One generally disputates when editing something, and removing that which is unnecessary. If one determines that an argument is out of place, then obviously the argument must be disputated. The first recorded case of a disputatation was in 1852 by Charles Darwin, when he disputated an argument from his upcoming book, which involved platypi and prehensile tailed porcupines.

Moronity

Moronity: noun. The property of being a moron. This can actually be measured with what is known as a “moronometer”. The basic unit for moronity is the duncere. Many new units have been made to measure moronity, but experts say that most of these are over 2 kilodunceres stupid. Alternative moronity units include: the idioter (π centidunceres), the stupiare (6.02*10²⁶ megadunceres), and the moronire (3 decidunceres). In 2006 a test was done on a group of young adults to try to find a correlation between level of moronity to severity of novumverbumquotidianadiagnostaphobia; this test used people with moronity ranging from 5cdn (centidunceres) to 14sp (stupiares), predictably this test revealed almost no correlation with a very slight indication that novumverbumquotidianadiagnostaphobia is inversely proportional to moronity.

Satisfieder

Satisfieder: adjective. The comparative form of the adjective satisfied. This word is often used when it is determined that a person isn't happier, but is satisfieder, which it has been confirmed by a team of highly educated specialists is not the same thing. The word was first used by the author Stephen King, when he learned that some of the changes he had made to the script of the comedy film "It" would be adapted into the actual movie.

Adentical

Adentical: adjective. Describing something which is not suitable in certain circumstances or in relation to something. This word is used to describe something, which is used but makes absolutely no sense, when it is used. For example in the sentence: "The icy beach was so arid.", the word "was" is clearly adentical, and should be replaced with something more suitable. This word was created by the Mexican painter Frida Kahlo, when she learnt of the word "apposite" and assumed that adentical was also a word that existed along with it.

Lichee

Lichee: noun. Lichee is a very common type of undead fruit in the underworld, usually eaten by liches. Although liches are the top consumers of lichee, this is not binding as lichees can also be eaten by zombies  and werewolves. Vampires, however, can not eat lichees since lichees are already dead and cannot be vampirised any further. In appearance, lichees resemble lychees, but according to aficionados, they taste far more "dead." 

Bizzare

Bizzare: adjective. As many hipster American businessmen would tell you, bizz is a very dandy way of saying "business" in a private sphere when wanting to sound very cool. However, Canadian businessmen have taken this expression even further by adding the "are" at the end to lend the word a meaning of "something so bizzy that it´s like... far out, dude." The term bizzare is often used in the maple syrup industry to denote a business that is truly hip and very swag; # yolo. 

Phloemboyant

Phloemboyant: adjective. Describing someone who is very out-going and easily attracts attention, but in an odd or disgusting manner; either by performing odd tricks (strange body contortions), bad humour (disgusting jokes) or by doing things which are considered rude or gross in public (nail-biting). The term was originally used by German playwright and poet Friedrich Schiller, to describe the way in which his friend Johann Wolfgang von Goethe entertained his guests.

Calvanisation

Calvanisation: noun. As opposed to galvanisation, which is the coating of steel or iron with a layer of zinc to prevent rusting, Calvanisation is the process of coating a Calvinist with this material to prevent them from moving. As Calvinists are known for often succumbing to Calvisignation (resigning on life because of the belief that their future has already been determined), some of them have officially started sponsoring other Calvinists to give up on life and - as suicide is deemed wrong - purchase a cocoon in which to reside until death.   

Entrotopic

Entrotopic: adjective. Describing something which is in the middle of two topics in a discussion or argument. Very often people introduce a type of filler, while people are organising their ideas and thoughts, and this is known as the entrotopic. It was originally used in the famous discussion of 1890 between Nikola Tesla and Thomas Alva Edison, where they were discussing their favourite fruits and vegetables. They both managed to agree that celery was the best vegetable, but after an entrotopic, they could not agree on the best fruit. Tesla wanted the kumquat, while Edison was greatly in favour of the passion fruit. Their inability to resolve their differences led to their break up and ceasing of cooperation.

Beforemath

Beforemath: noun. Beforemath is the opposite of aftermath - the word describes the consequences of an occurrence that hasn't happened yet. Although one may think that beforemath would be quite difficult to encounter, it may in fact be ubiquitous. Recent discoveries in the field of physics have proved that there are certain particles that move faster than light. The sometimes accepted conclusion from that, based on Einstein's assumptions, would be that these particles are moving against the flow of time and as such, their movement through the fourth dimension is beforemath, as the thing that caused them to do so is still hanging in the future somewhere. The fact that this phenomenon can be observed appears to disprove the assumption that anything faster than light goes back in time, but theoretical physicists - detached from the real world as they are - seem to take no notice.

Afternight

Afternight: noun. An alternate name for the morning, which is popular on the Isle of Man, as well as Guernsey. In fact, there has been a long on going debate between the islands of Guernsey and Jersey, where the people of the island of Jersey mock the inhabitants of Jersey for their silly usage of the word. It is also important to distinguish between the ways the the word is used on the Isle of Man and on Guernsey. On the Isle of Man the word is only used, if it is currently that time of day when the sentence is being spoken.  In other words you can only use it in the morning. However on Guernsey, it is the other way around, the word can only be used, when it isn't morning. The problem that arises, is that the Isle of Man and Guernsey, do not have the word "morning" and so during the morning on Guernsey, the morning is simply not referred to in the morning, and vice versa on the Isle of Man.

Suckerfish

Suckerfish: noun. Suckerfish is the official term newly recognised by all countries of the commonwealth and the USA, encompassing the Genuses ancistrus, beaufortia, echeneis and all other fish whose main identifying trait is the fact that they suck on things. In order to prevent confusion, the Union of Fish Integrity has put together the following dichotomous key to identify a true suckerfish.

Is the species concerned a fish?
Does this species spend most of its time glued to an object by its mouth?
Is this species whiskerless? 
Does this fish appear too lazy to swim?
If you have answered yes to all of these questions, the fish you have just identified truly is a suckerfish or a Ukrainian politician.

EUphoria

EUphoria: noun. EUphoria, read "ee-yoo-fough-ree-a," is the ecstatic joy (a step up from upbeat joy and a step down from rapturous joy) of being admitted, or at any rate considering being admitted, into the European Union. One can also feel EUphoria just from taking part in the European Union, although that feeling is quite rare. The recent occurrences in Ukraine, for example, are a perfect illustration of EUphoria, since the opposition is so infatuated and frenzied with the idea of being admitted into the European Union, that its supporters decided to break through the police barricade with a bulldozer and ride into parliament on it. Another example of EUphoria is when the Greek minister of finances found out that the EU was going to bail it out of debt with a loan of 34.4 billion euros. Who wouldn't be EUphoric at that...

Testosteral

Testosteral: adjective. Describing something or someone, who is very masculine or full of testosterone, for example a woman undergoing a sex-change. In a recent survey conducted in hospitals and other medical facilities, it was discovered that testosteral was the third most popular word spoken, beaten only by "Help" and "Ow". Many men consider it a very manly word and so may often repeat it in completely unrelated scenarios and situations, seeing it as fitting simply because of its masculinity. Interestingly, there is no similar word relating to estrogen and the authors of this blog feel that it is very improper. Unfortunately, they can do nothing about it.

Victimator

Victimator: noun. Through the very arduous study of the Spanish-English dictionary by James Mabbe (a very important Spanish to English translator of the seventeenth century), it had been found that many words in Spanish do not have an English equivalent. One of these words, James Mabbe noted, was victimario, basically translating to "one who victimises others." The fact that this word appeared in a piece of very rhythmical Spanish poetry led Mabbe to create the word victimator, since "one who victimises others" was a bit too wordy for proper poetic translation. The result of Mabbe's research is the following excerpt: 

The dark of the room had been looming on me,
I drew to the fiery fiend,
It's tongue had been spitting and fuming on me,
The moment came when we convened.

And as I stepped close, the incinerator,
Which had been turned on by my wife,
Became my whole body's foul victimator,
I ended up losing my life.

Ludicrosity

Ludicrosity: noun. So, although one may think that ludicrosity is known as the measure of the ludicrousness of something or someone, this is completely ludicrous. In fact, the word is clearly a type of ancient game from Malta, invented by the Aztecs, where people stand in a cross and the last person still standing after a series of challenges is declared the loser. This then repeats until there is only one person who has successfully won all the games by not remaining standing. Depending on the determination and honesty of the players, a game of ludicrosity can take anywhere between 6 minutes and 2 months.

Undecaffeinated

Undecaffeinated: adjective. An object, most usually in liquid form, in which the process of decaffeinating has been reversed and caffeine has been added to something from which it was originally removed. Undecaffeination is particularly useful on April Fools' Day as a practical joke, since anyone who consumes undecaffeinated coffee thinking it is decaffeinated will find themselves under an increased amount of stress and will most probably end up running around wildly in a fit of hyperactivity. Because of the seeming impracticality of undecaffeination, many people simply choose to caffeinate, but experts will confirm that undecaffeination is far more sagacious.  

Plunt

Plunt: noun. Although one may at first thought think that this is something rather rude, a plunt is in fact one of the most innocent things imaginable. It is the name given to the look people have when they see something extraordinarily cute, for example bunnies of puppies. It is characterised by hazy eyes and a blank stare, as well as a slightly open mouth and shallow breathing. Many people accompany their plunt with a sound, which is commonly transcribed as: "Awwwww...". However it has been scientifically proven that this is incorrect, and it is in fact spelt as: "Aughhhhhhh...".

Rhymelessness

Rhymelessness: noun. The state of being absoluetly rhymeless, which relates not only to words, but also to people, notes and visual arts. For example, the word purple was (at least until the invention of the word shmurple) rhymeless, as there used to be no word that rhymed with it.  Many opera fans would add to this, saying that Luciano Pavarotti also demonstrated a sense of rhymelessness, because there will never be anyone like him. In a quite different way, one could say that certain notes are rhymeless; for example the brown note, as the only thing that would rhyme with it would be another brown note - the repeated use of which would make people rather angry. Moreover, in the art field, the repetition of certain elements (which is called visual rhyme) is sometimes aesthetically pleasing, however not with certain motifs like lemmings on spikes, rendering them absolutely rhymeless.

Shmurple

Shmurple: verb. To shmurple has a variety of negative connotations, as the action is most commonly associated with lurking, skulking, crouching, creeping, crawling and behaving shadily. However, the original meaning of the word is quite different; in the early nineteenth century, someone who shmurpled was one who was in a continuous state of excreting. The word was invented by William Blake whose frustration with the rhyme-less-ness of the word purple led him to invent a word that would rhyme with it. He used it in one of his poems, fittingly titled "The Secret Purple Thing."

There once was a man who had nasal congestion,
He also had problems with bad indigestion,
His poo had turned purple,
And he had to shmurple,
To see if it needed ingestion.

Complainment

Complainment: noun. The combination of a complain and a compliment. In essence, a complainment is a complaint given in the form of a compliment to a person. Very often this is very confusing, absurd, ironic, not-understandable, frustrating, infuriating and discriminatory. There are various reactions people can have to receiving a complainment; the most common types of reactions are: confusion, euphoria, uncontrollable laugher, weeping or extreme depression. Specifically for this reason, it is very dangerous to give complainments, and the authors of this blog sincerely discourage people from giving them.

Mariage

Mariage: noun. As opposed to a marriage, where two souls become united in holy matrimony, a Mariage is when a person, usually a female, accepts the name Mary or Maria either as a second name or instead of their first name. It is absolutely impossible to change one´s second name to Mary or Maria and call it a Mariage. Though not as frequent as marriages, mariages maintain popularity among many layers of society. Reasons for Marying include rise in religiousness, infatuation with Greek opera singers and detailed analysis of Jane Austen´s Pride and Prejudice.

Cucumbersome

Cucumbersome: adjective. Describing something which gets in the way by the usage of cucumbers or products which involve cucumbers. This word was created in the early 20th century after the great cucumber disaster of Baltimore. There are varying accounts of what actually happened, but the general idea is as follows. The city theatre was putting on a show which involved a large amount of cucumbers being present on stage, around 200 of them, however due to a grave typo and several mistakes in the director's office, the supply of cucumbers was ordered from every supplier in the country. This resulted in over 4,000,000 cucumbers being shipped to Baltimore and the surrounding area every week, with a general cucumber famine in the rest of the country. Eventually the situation was resolved thanks to the import of rabbits, which in hand lead to the great rabbit calamity of Washington DC. The whole event was described by many as cucumbersome. 

Alpacatalpa

Alpacatalpa: noun. Alpacatalpa is a term used to describe a very unlikely (but possible) situation that eventually happens in a series of unexpected events. The word itself came from the conjunction of the words "alpaca" and "catalpa" gaining the meaning of "alpaca in a catalpa." While botanist-zoologists would immediately understand the paradox of this situation, it is necessary to explain to the rest of the readers that finding an alpaca in a catalpa tree is highly unlikely not only because both are found at quite different latitudes, but also because of an alpaca´s weight, which would restrict its ability to climb trees and the ability of other people to push it up there. However, no one disagrees with the fact that an alpaca may eventually end up in a catalpa, which was proved in 1982 when a group of astronauts spotted an alpaca in a catalpa orbiting one of Saturn´s moons. It has since been deduced that both had appeared there as a result of the random movement of particles, but at the time, the USSR was suspected of rather questionable and possibly even reprehensible space colonisation techniques.   

Retorse

Retorse: noun. Condolences provided in the form of a response to something. Retorses are very much applicable and appropriate, when someone is speaking of a sad event, for example a funeral or death a beloved pet. Many times retorses are expected by the speaker, as a form of acknowledgment that the listener understands just how tragic the entire occurrence was. However one must be very careful that the expression of grief and sadness is genuine, for it is very offensive to provide a retorse when a retorse isn't appropriate or wanted, and uttering it at the incorrect time, can result in a permanent declaration of hatred.

Aggronaut

Aggronaut: noun. In a section that Homer later scratched from his Iliad, a group of aggronauts had a brief appearance, the particulars of which are related in the excerpt here written (no author´s rights are being violated here considering Homer has been dead for over two and a half millennia):

Αν μπορείτε να διαβάσετε ελληνικά, καλό για σας.
Αν έπρεπε να βάλω αυτό στο μεταφραστή, δεν έχετε ζωή.

Clearly, Homer was being very poetic when he wrote this and there is hardly anything left to be said about aggronauts after such a terrific and imaginative story. 

Satting

Satting: noun. Although regular readers of this blog might find the logicality of this word and its meaning slightly baffling, satting is truly related to the similarly spelt word: sitting. In fact, satting can only be done while sitting, as doing it while standing would probably be terminated by personnel ensuring proper satting. Now to the meaning of the word: satting is the act of sitting an SAT test, which is largely required by universities in the USA. Most American students wishing to go to university have to sat, which they do sitting. As previously mentioned, improper behaviour while satting is (usually) not tolerated and may result in the confiscation of one´s SAT test, therefore ending the action of satting, even though the person previously doing it may still be carrying on with the action that resulted in their punishment after it has been carried out.

Trired

Trired: adjective. Weary of moving from place to place. A common occurrence in people who travel frequently and great distances, it can be quite a hindrance, as it can limit the body's ability to function properly. However not everyone becomes trired and there is a significant number of people who can travel as much as they please without suffering in any way. Some people believe that one can only become trired from travelling on a bus, but it has been confirmed by scientists that the mode of transportation is completely and entirely irrelevant.

Studious

Studious: verb. To study, read or gain knowledge with a large amount of effort, will or determination. The origin of this word comes either from Kent, Surrey or Hertfordshire, but it is uncertain as to exactly where. It has been observed in the 19th, 20th and 21st century that pupils, students and probationers have been studiousing less and less, and rather have reverted to studying, listening or simply ignoring. It is important that schools, colleges and universities encourage their alumni, trainees, and novices to studious more rather than ignoring the importance of a quality education, learning, or apprenticeship.

Deppraisal

Deppraisal: noun. It is extremely difficult to describe or define deppraisal as even people who often deppraise aren't entirely sure what they are doing. The only things that are certain, is that it involves taxation, a lot of evaluation and some mashed potatoes. People who deppraise are known as deppraisers and are extremely rare in most regions of the world. The largest density of deppraisers is in Sierra Leone, with a density of 23.34 deppraisers per square kilometre. A famous example of a deppraiser was the engineer Gustave Eiffel, who was a deppraiser in secret, when he currently wasn't working on any project, although the authors of this blog are unaware of any major achievement he accomplished in his life.

Antiemoticon

Antiemoticon: noun. Unlike the common interpretation of the word, an antiemoticon is, in fact, not used to describe the movement for the ban of emoticons on the grounds of Taiwanese congress. Indeed an, antiemoticon is something far more complex - the exact opposite of an emoticon, working on the simple principle of stoicism. It is no secret that many people have trouble expressing their emotions which makes them afraid of using normal emoticons. This is why a group of several British researchers came up with antiemoticons conveying so little emotion that it is barely picked up by a regular reader. The team introduced several antiemoticons, but since all of them looked absolutely emotionless, they were all named "stoic emoticon" with a number attached on the end.

Just for your information and enrichment, an example of a stoic emoticon is this:
:-
and another example is this:
: |

Menelick

Menelick: verb. Menelicking, also called Menelickery when one wants to sound posh, has in fact nothing to do with licking anything or anyone. Indeed, Menelicking actually refers to doing something rather plain or simple - in other words, idiotic. The word comes from the old legend of King Menelik the first, son of King Solomon and the Queen of Sheba, who decided that it would be nice to have a small walk on Kilimanjaro in his father´s regalia. Sadly for him, he froze to death.

Brapse

Brapse: noun. The complete shut-down of the central processing unit of a human. A person can suffer a brapse when he is placed under great stress, or has over-worked himself. It is common for these conditions to last only a very short while, however while they are occurring, the sufferer is completely incapable of doing anything, even as simple as speaking or heaven-forbid thinking. Brapses were first identified by the brilliant physicist Niels Bohr, after he had had a particularly long session of working on a problem for 23 hours straight without stopping. Bohr however believed that with enough practice, one could train himself to no longer experience brapses. He did not live long enough for his hypothesis to be proven, dying at the young age of 77.

Helectionism

Helectionism: noun. Helectionism is an occurrence in linguistics that describes the ruleless translation of words from languages where "h" is replaced by "g" into languages which have both of these letters. For example, when the Russian river "Volga" is translated into Czech, the spelling changes to "Volha." However, when the Russian astronaut Gagarin is translated into Czech, his name remains the same, rather than changing to the obvious "Haharin."  This is a clear example of Helectionism, where a "g" is converted into an "h" only according to the whims of its translator, rather than following some clearly defined rules. Another example of such logic-lacking occurrence is when the word "glasnost" is not translated as "hlasnost," but as "publicita," which is obviously nothing but stupid.  

Thiraeth

Thiraeth: noun. A homesickness for a place which you have previously visited, but couldn't consider your home, due to the length of stay, people present or other unfavourable conditions. This is commonly observed in people who are unloved by their peers and relatives or people without relatives. Some psychologists believe that thiraeth can be associated with an enlargement of the hypothalamus or basal ganglia. The feeling is known to coincide with loneliness, languish, depression, nostalgia, grief and yearning. Thiraeth was first observed and described by Spaniard Miguel Cervantes in one of his many failed attempts at writing in English. Although none of the attempts have seen the light of day, the word has come into common usage.

Languini

Languini: noun. A type of pasta commonly eaten in the North-southern part of Italy and known for its very lazy characteristics and lack of movement when on the plate. Languini was invented in the 1760's by a renowned Italian pizza maker from Seggiano, Giuseppe Ficarotta. He created the magical dish while experimenting with tobacco, as well as tomato sauce. Languini has become popular all around, however it is often overlooked when introduced with other forms of pasta, specifically because of its lazy nature. There are many disputes about this, but several dignified and highly respected scholars, claim that languini pales in comparison with spaghetti, fusilli, pellizzoni, spaghettini, spaghettoni, ziti, bavette, fettuccine, lasagne, linguine, mefaldine, pappardelle, pizzoccheri, stringozzi, tagliatelle, cannelloni, cavatappi, ditalini, garganelli, gomiti, manicotti, penne, rigatoni, rotini, conchiglie, farfalle, fiori, lanterne, quadrefiore, radiatori, strozzapreti, anelli, ditali, fideos, risi, fagottini, ravioli, tortellini and many more.

Yanyaga

Yanyaga: noun. Contrary to popular belief, yanyaga is not a word of japanese origin and has nothing to do with strange stuff one may find on the internet originating from that country. In fact, yanyagas were created by the strange unison of a Spanish word and Russian folklore, as the name was derived from the words "llano," meaning "flat" in Spanish and "Yaga," a Russian mythical character best described in the Pitcairn Dictionary of Weird Stuff as "an old hag living deep in the forests of Eastern Europe in a house standing on one chicken leg, whose role in mythology is so ambiguous, that she is an even larger mystery than Putin´s bedtime habits." As the question lends itself immediately, it is necessary to state that it is absolutely unknown how this word was created and furthermore, its definition is disputed by many scholars. Some say that the word reflects the too "flat" portrayal of Baba Yaga in certain films, while others maintain that a yanyaga is simply a Baba Yaga that had ended up under an ice resurfacing machine. Either way, the most probable is the hypothesis introduced by the Sevillan institute for linguistics, which states that in fact, the word yanyaga had been derived from the word "lleno" rather than "llano," changing the meaning from "flat" to "full." This would mean that a yanyaga can either describe a full Baba Yaga or a place full of them.

Flufferfish

Flufferfish: noun. A type of sea dweller that is too lazy to reproduce and feeds mostly on corals and kittens. Though kittens are not usually found in their natural habitat, it has been found that flufferfish indulge in the taste of fresh kitten meat (the scientist who found this out was later sentenced to death by stoning with dog biscuits by an illegal, but rather official looking, court set up by PETA). Flufferfish are technically a genetic mutation of pufferfish, but they have been classified by the EXPERTS society of fish breeders as a separate species because of their unique fluffy traits and unwillingness to reproduce, which usually leaves their owners to do the dirty work for them.

Rason

Rason: noun. An explanation of something which in someway involves the Great and Powerful Sun God Ra. For centuries and millenia, people have provided rasons to please the Great and Powerful Sun God Ra and to appease him in an attempt to be pardoned or given special privileges. Obviously this posting is purely informational and in no way are the authors of this blog attempting to influence the Great and Powerful Sun God Ra. The Great and Powerful Sun God Ra is almost always merciful to those who provide rasons and has been known to have bouts of rasoning when making decisions.

Zeqex

Zeqex: noun. A word artificially created and introduced to the English dictionary one night by an anonymous person playing scrabble. The story goes that this person was unfortunate enough to be stuck with the letters "q," "x" and "z" without having any vowel but two "es." Frustrated, the man quickly seized the dictionary sitting on the table and scribbled the word zeqex in it to justify his use of this term in the game. His rivals, however, soon saw through the trick, not as much because of how terrible the handwriting was, but because the man forgot to write down a definition for his newly coined word. Therefore, we can only speculate what this word means and it is very likely that we will never find out, for the man who invented the word was later stoned for cheating.

Slerf

Slerf: noun. A historically outdated class of people who were neither slaves nor serfs and were defined in Norman society by the following rules:
1. They were allowed to own no land.
2. They worked for their superior receiving no pay for any service provided.
3. Most importantly, they were only partial property of their master (hence the fact that they were neither slaves nor serfs). This meant that their master owned a certain share of "their" slerf, usually ranging from about 40 to 75 per cent and he was allowed to "cash in" at any time, meaning that he could hack off as large a portion of the slerf as he owned.

Spoontaneous

Spoontaneous: adjective. To be unpredictable and relating to spoons. Spoontaneous behaviours have been documented in almost every human culture, the only confirmed exception so far being the Mongols. Spoontaneous behaviours have also been observed in captive animals; animals with the most frequent of these behaviours include gorillas, monkeys and fish. The spoontaneous behaviours shown by these animals varied greatly from throwing spoons (or spoon-like objects) at other animals, to throwing other animals at spoons (or spoon-like objects). Oddly, this kind of random behaviour has not been recorded often enough with objects like forks or knives for a word to be made for unpredictable behaviour with them, these objects are often interacted with in very predictable ways by animals (including humans) captive or otherwise.

Barberqueue

Barberqueue: verb. To queue behind a barber or to queue while waiting for one. Although the thought lends itself immediately, barberqueueing does not necessarily have to occur with the purpose of eventually having one´s hair cut. In fact, one can barberqueue for anything and anywhere, provided it is eventually obtained from a barber. Interestingly, if a couple of barbers stand behind each other in a circle and pass back any random object, they are all simultaneously barberqueueing.    

Scarerific

Scarerific: adjective. To be excessively scary in a positive way. For something to be truly scarerific it mustn’t be scary enough to be defined as scareble (excessively scary in a negative way), but must be scary enough to avoid being un-scary (with an excessive lack of scariness). Scarerific was originally used as a term in television back in 2005 to give a name to the ideal level of scariness writers were meant to make a horror show. Eventually enough writers thought that making a show scary would imply that they were supposed to make it scarerific unless stated otherwise and the word was seen as redundant, by the end of the year no one seemed to remember using the word at all. If you remember using this word in 2005 then feel free to post a comment on this post, unless you are afraid of not fitting in with all the people who don’t remember or won’t admit remembering the use of this word in 2005.

Creditodebitism

Creditodebitism: noun. Creditodebitism is the collective term encompassing all people who are not able to distinguish credit cards from debit cards and are, therefore, called creditodebilists. The ratio of creditodebitists to credit and debit literates in Europe has, especially in the last few decades, fallen so rapidly, that the central agency for the preservation of cultures and traditions in the European Union decided to proclaim creditodebilitism a threatened cultural heritage in need of protection.