Batctus

Batctus: noun. A word describing a grilled bat stuck on a cactus, a not too popular meal in Mexico. While the cactus itself is not eaten, its prickly exterior allows several bats to be put on it before being spun around above an open fire, much like a gyros. According to natives, a batctus is the most disgusting dish imaginable and its consumption is purely a matter of tradition, the maintenance of which is governed and funded by the UNESCO. Professional batctus eaters are also payed by the organisation to perform the ritual of cooking, consuming and then vomiting in front of tourists and UNESCO even contributed to building signs along major Mexican highways explaining the importance of batcti to natives and foreigners alike. The pronunciation of the word itself is rather complicated for English speakers, nevertheless, many poets have come to appreciate its rhythmic ring. For example the poet William McGonagall wrote the following short poem about the ritual of preparing a batctus:

One morning when sitting on a cactus,

A man - I am sorry to say,

Decided to prepare a batctus,

To brighten his terrible day.

His hand grabbed a bat wing which maybe,

Was harvested in Dundee bay,

He stuck it gently as a baby,

On the spikes of the cactus to stay.

A strong sound from the distance drew near him,

Something that was coming his way,

And the man said to himself looking quite dim:

It was stupid of me, yes a man from Dundee, to prepare a batctus on a railway.