Agnustic

Agnustic: noun. A person who is not sure gnus exist and refuses to take a definitive position on the topic. A common reason for agnusticism is lack of first-hand evidence counterweighed by access to plenty second-hand evidence. Conversely, some agnustics have plenty experience with gnus but embrace a form of Pyrrhonian Scepticism with regards to the world in general. The word agnostic should not be confused with the word agnoustics, the sonic capabilities of a gnu.  

Spiritsuality

Spiritsuality: noun. A proclivity for drinking alcohol. A person who practices spiritsuality is spiritsual and is often called a spiritsualist. My uncle is a self-proclaimed spiritsualist. Having grown up in times of deepest and darkest Communism, he turned to the only publicly accepted form of religion when he was but a teenager. My mum was close to becoming a spiritsualist, but decided that her genetic makeup was not too favourable to a safe sort of spiritsuality. My dad, on the other hand, is a spiritsualist only on Sundays, which is, lamentably, how most people treat religion these days. 

Discribe

Discribe: verb. The word discribe has two definitions, the former being by far the more popular one:

1.      To malign something or someone, usually but not necessarily in print.

2.      To stop a scribe from being a scribe. This can be done in numerous ways, for example by firing them and writing them a very bad review so that they are never hired again. Other popular discription methods include plaguing a scribe with deep existential questions about the value of their work, inducing writer’s block on them, or simply chopping their hands off.

Decomposter

Decomposter: noun. Someone who or something that destroys a compost. A compost is not necessarily destroyed through violent disruption. An irony of the compost is that it can be too good at being a compost, and consequently composts itself. Thus, it becomes its own decomposter.