Koockaroo

Koockaroo: verb. When an individual goes to poop and runs out of toilet paper. This word can only be used in the passive voice, so instead of using it in sentences like: “I koockaroo, you koockaroo, he/she koockaroos,” one has to say “I have been koockarooed, you have been koockarooed, he/she has been koockarooed,” probably followed by a very persistent wail. The word was invented in ancient Greek horse-motels, where travellers would stay overnight. At the break of dawn, roosters would always start crowing and at that signal, the workers of the horse-motel always changed the toilet papyruses in the bathrooms. The local legend in the town of Marathon says that one day, the great Odysseus stayed at one of these horse-motels and contracted diarrhoea. He sat on the toilet all night and before the break of dawn, he ran our of toilet papyrus. Not willing to waste time, Odysseus tried to imitate the crowing of a rooster to attract the attention of the servants by screaming “Koockaroo-doodly-doodly-doo” out of the window, and so the name (or at least part of it) stuck.