Friday, 9 August 2013

Elcumber


Elcumber: Noun. A thin, typically green fruit which makes a noticeable “popping” sound as long as it is ripe. When placed upside-down an elcumber will make a loud sound much like a human infant crying. Because of its constant noise this fruit has failed financially several times and is no longer available as a commercial product. The elcumber was invented in a secret government base (Exactly which government(s) funded this base is unclear, even to the employees) which was made to make genetically superior plants to ones that exist today. Two employees apparently invented the elcumber after a conversation that went something like this:
“Why does the beginning of the word ‘cucumber’ sound like the letter Q?”
“Maybe it stands for something…”
“What would it stand for? Quiet? Is there a loud version?”
“There will be… There… will… be…”
There is no record of whether or not these employees still have their jobs.

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