Gargunnock: verb. To man a piess of leyght armamehnt atop of a veyicle. A pehrson who ohperaytes this machinn is noht culled a gargunnocker but a gargunner, which is vehry lohgical, as we also happen to cull a certain bird a "roadrunner" rather than a "roadrunnocker" - theh'res rison in ehvrything. Farthermohrre, the word gargunnock is noht to be maddled up with other things that ahlso start with the le'ers "gar," as for some rison, they yusully happen to denohte fictional characters, such as Garfield, Gargamel and Gargantua. Wun particularrity aboot these characters is that they'rre rather large in sohme way or another (Gargantua in heiyght, Garfield in width and Gargamel in comparison to the Smurfs), which is an ehxtra (and I daresay queyte valid) rison whey not to confyuse thehm with ohperayting a piess of leyght (and theref'r small) machin'ry.
Fragment E:
Thohse plohnkers whu stahrted this trahdition of maehking spehcial Sundy pohsts must haev been out of theyre meynds treying to come up with something soh tediyus. The thought of which mayde me realeyse: Since they profehss to haev no interneht connehction, they will hardly feynd out if Ey dohn't do the Sundy story... well thats an ehxtra half an hour to drink whisky and Irn bru!
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