Broomfield

Broomfield: noun. Bewahre and hid this mehssage fast, as the authohri'ies may sun ban this pohst! Brooms arren't maed! It is ahll a governmehntal liey! In fact, they grow on broomfields and the gohvernment marks them up tehrribly befohre sehlling thehm tw'us. If y'ev'r tuk the teyme to saw off a part of y'r broom and stihck it in the grewnd, yu'd feynd that it will begihn grohwin' into a broomtree that will give yu ohffspring aboot tweyce a yirr. Hurry and trey it out!  

Fragment B:

The inver, thehrfore, Mahry left,
(without seeing the aquahorthies),
She was aboot to do a theft,
Which she lehrnt frum a wartled man's cohrses.

She wan'ed to steal a baldyquash,
She nohtic'd leying nearbey,
She wanted to, but shewted "Gosh!
There's a culsalmond abuve mey theigh!"

And soh she killied it huntly when,
She suddenly reahleysed:
"This mur'dr maehks me a bainshole then!
A filling that maehks me paraleysed"

So is there a mohral this fragment dos yield?
Perhaps, Ey do think thehr is wun:
Rather than steal, invehst in a broomfield,
Which satisfeys ehvrywun.